THE PRACTICAL SIDE OF HOMESCHOOLING...

I submitted the following letter to the Happily Educating OuR Own email list and got many requests to share the information I received. What follows are the responses from various homeschoolers living across the Greater Phoenix Area.

WANTED:  FEEDBACK ABOUT CHORES
      [Submitted by Dawn ]

"I could use your help in emailing me the typical day's chores performed by your home schooling students. (If you put the age of the child with the chores they do that would be helpful.) All my kids struggle with accepting chores as a part of our daily life but my 16 year old is completely convinced that there is NO kid in Phoenix who has to do as many chores as he does. He actually said that if I could "prove" he's not the only one---he would stop complaining that his workload is unfair. (Yes, I'm the parent and he has to obey regardless; nothing has changed about his chores so far. But it might be helpful to diffuse the struggle if I make the effort to show him he has "company". Maybe I expect too much but I hardly doubt it.) Thanks."

Our 14 year old son is in charge of taking out the garbage (when needed), cleaning the bathroom sink (weekly), yard maintenance - grass, bush, and tree trimming (when needed, and sometimes with the help of his grandfather), vacuuming specified rooms (weekly), PC maintenance and troubleshooting, emptying and refilling the cat box (!), feeding and watering the cat, emptying the central vacuum canister, and picking up all  heavy or out-of-reach things for Mom and sisters.  Periodically he rotates with his sisters the following:  washing the family's laundry for a duration of one month and the nightly kitchen/dining room cleaning for a duration of one week.  Something I asked him to do when I was last pregnant but one that I've come to depend on is his help with the grocery shopping.  He pushes the cart, loads the groceries onto the conveyor belt (with the help of his sisters), puts everything into the van, and once home, carries it all to the kitchen.  It's gotten to the point where he just needs me to drive and pay.

Boy - 13 years old
vacuum downstairs every morning and upstairs M/W/F
clean downstairs bathroom (mirrors, sink, toilet, floor) every morning
brush dog T/TH (golden retriever)
feed and water dog daily
dump and sort laundry, Friday evening, start first load
dishes helper for supper (clear table, dry and put away hand washed dishes)

Girl - 11 years old
sweep all tile floor areas daily, mop M/W/F
clean upstairs bathroom (as above)
dump and sort laundry, Tuesday evening, start first load
dishes helper for lunch (as above)

Boy - 9 years old
take out kitchen trash after breakfast - daily
sweep walkways and stepping stones around the house - daily
pick up all dog doo - daily
dust one room each day
dishes helper for breakfast (as above but usually includes emptying
dishwasher)

Boy - 4 years old
take out trash from all other rooms - daily
clean out cat litter box - daily
put things in the recycle bins after meals

Saturday jobs are different and as follows:
vacuum stairs
clean windows and glass doors that get the dirtiest
scrub bathtubs (2)

The three older ones rotate through this list with each one doing one job on
Saturday.

That's it for now though I often feel that they are lounging around while I
work and work so I am considering adding cooking a breakfast for each of the
three older ones, putting the trash bins out and back and the recyle bins
out and back, and whatever else I can think of.

I also willingly pay them for additional jobs like cleaning out the Suburban
($2), cutting down oleander bushes in the spring and loading them in the
truck ($10), babysitting ($10 night), pulling weeds, picking up mesquite
beans, fixing river rock slides.

My oldest earns $5 week brushing a neighbor dog and Christer earns $1 per
visit for cleaning up dog pooh for various neighbors.  All my kids worked
spreading rock for another neighbor and my oldest made a lot of money
hanging Christmas Lights in the neighborhood.  So, when they do their jobs
well at home it does qualify them for work which pays.

I have 3 babies. 4yrs, 3yrs and an 11 month old. On a daily basis the 3 and 4 year olds have to make their bed, clean their room (includes pick up and organization. Basically all I have to do is vacuum!!), feed the dogs,
help dad take out trash every night, and when they do all that they must ask if I need any help with anything. Then they are allowed to do something fun!! My 11 month old so far can put her toys away (with help) and (try) to straighten her blanket on her bed. Chores are good for mom and kids. I'm way happier when things are done and the kids like knowing that our house is theirs too!!

I HAVE A 9 AND A 10 YEAR OLD AND THEY ALTERNATE MONTHLY: VACUUM, STAIRS, UP AND DOWNSTAIRS, LAUNDRY, WASHING, DRYING, FOLDING AND PUTTING AWAY, KEEPING ROOM CLEAN, PICKING UP DOGGIE MESSES, HELPING WITH DINNER. KITCHEN: DISHES, WASHING AND PUTTING AWAY COUNTERS AND KEEPING IT IN ORDER THROUGHOUT THE DAY, TRASH, SWEEPING AND MOPPING AND ARCADIA DOOR, BATHROOMS, TOILETS SINK MIRRORS FLOORS IN ALL THREE BATHROOMS MY SIX AND THREE YEAR OLD ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE DUSTING,COLLECTING THE ROOMS AND BATHROOM TRASH, CLEAN UP OF THE LIVING ROOM AND TV ROOM, DOOR JAMS THAT HAVE FINGER MARKS AND THEIR ROOMS, LAUNDRY, AND AREAS THAT THEY HAVE CONTRIBUTED TO THE MESS. WE HAVE DAILY WEEKLY AND MONTHLY CHORES: YARD, GARAGE, VAN, ARE ALSO AREAS THEY CLEAN.

Son Age 13: vacuuming the living room and Arizona room once a week, unloading the dishwasher when asked, setting or clearing the table each night, taking out the trash when asked.

Son Age 15: cleaning the boy's bathroom once a week (everything except the floor: the tub, vanity, mirror, toilet), unloading the dishwasher when asked, setting or clearing the table when asked. He is handy so also helps his dad change the oil, build things, and do those sort of projects.

Son Age 16: Our 16 year old has had a job for almost a year. He works a total of about 17-20 hours a week. He purchased his own used (older model) car, buys his own gas, fast food if he wants it, movie tickets, clothes, etc. and is now saving for his own computer which he will buy this summer. We don't make him do a lot of chores around here anymore because he is pretty busy w/ school and working, but he does help out around dinner time. The three of them take turns feeding the dog and also do yard work, although we have Xeriscape in the front and small yard in the back, not a lot of mowing.

Chores have always been part of our routine my boys are 14 and 17. They do their own laundry (washing, folding, putting away) anything they don't fold and put away gets donated to a local charity (our thought is they don't want it someone else can use it). They clean their rooms, bathroom, load and unload the dishwasher, take out the garbage and put it out to the street for pick up and bring it back up?they have been doing chores forever?. We pay them to wash the cars and this summer they are earning extra money by repairing our roof (resealing the flat part). This gives them the money they want for things. When they want to save for a large purchase (bass guitar) we will pay half?  

My 13 year old son averages at least 1 hour of chores a day. Some days it is more--like yesterday, we mowed our 1/2 acre of all grass and did other outside chores that took 4 hours. I pick and choose what chores need to be done that day. Here is a list of typical chores that he does: dishes (hand wash and dishwasher), laundry (he does his own), clean HIS bathroom, rake leaves, trim trees, water garden, water flowers, sweep porch/patio, trash, recyclables, clean dog bowls/beds/pick up yard, vacuum floors and mop tile, clean eaves and windows, and dust furniture. Some of these chores are done daily and some weekly.  

17-male DAILY kitchen counters picked up, mop the floors (It's a huge heavy job), pick up family room once a day, twice weekly garbage, during the summer will usually mow one yard, once a week, some days dishes, does own laundry once a week. 16-female Daily pick up kids bathroom, feed and water the cats, help with younger sisters, help with cooking, dishes once a week, in charge of putting food away, own laundry 15-male Daily sweep floor, pick up dog poop, take out trash, clean out van, help with lawn mowing and sweeping outside, own laundry 14-male Daily feed and water dogs, dishes once a week, lawn mowing a yard, own laundry, helping with younger siblings.

Our 12 year old son mows/trims grass, maintains our pool cleaning/chems etc, keeps room clean (always, unless sick), laundry (usually daily), makes the bread,  prepares meals (simple or leftovers),  oversees his younger sisters as they work/clean etc (continually),  babysits siblings (incl changing diapers and feeding the baby), repairs in the home as needed (just switched light switches from dimmers/fixed potty from running 3 times/changed air filter/changed light bulbs/taking doors of and on that wouldn't close)-daily, vacuums, does dishes, helped dad put up a block wall, then was responsible to finish small section on his own, walks the dog 3x's a day/gives him baths,self directed on all homeschool to start and finish what he is responsible for, other jobs as needed, but a chore time every morning

These are just a few of his normal duties that he is expected to complete well, with a good attitude and do with out being asked.  For his reward, he is allow to have freedoms the younger ones don't get and staying up later with mom and dad or getting other perks, but the biggest reward will come later when he will have mastered all of these things in preperation for being a GOOD husband and father.  He knows that is the vision we are to impart upon him and our duty from the Lord.  He is turning 13 this month and is away with his father to Wash DC to attend Vision Forums "Mens Titanic Society" where they will share how men were men on the Titanic and men work hard!  We are celebrating his "Coming of age" into manhood with a big party as the Jews do and he is excited even though he knows it also means MORE responsibilities and yes chores, because that is being a MAN!  Tell your son to stand up tall and proud and say, bring it on mom, I can do anything you ask me too!!!   Someday his wife will be proud to have a husband that is able to take care of all her needs!!

My kids are 5 (girl) and 6 (boy) years old. They set the table for every meal, clean it after every meal, unload and reload the dishwasher, wipe the table and chairs and vacuum the floor under the table as needed.
They clean the dog poop once a week.
They feed and water all the animals (4 animals) every day.
They know how to make their own breakfast and do so several times a week (nothing complex) and occasionally make their own sandwiches for lunch.  Obviously, the handle all their own personal hygiene issues, including making sure all the clothes make it into the laundry basket and helping sort the dirty laundry and fold and put away the clean laundry.
They are responsible for wiping down their bathroom sink after brushing teeth, washing,etc. . .
All their toys (indoor and outdoor) are their responsibility and they make their own beds. 
They are responsible for cleaning up their school materials when done (glue wiped up from table, papers put away, etc) and are learning to help cook, do cleaning around the house, etc.
If they break something being careless (son was using sunglasses as a weapon when playing) that is a necessity (sunglasses for our family are, as we have eye problems) they are responsible for paying for it out of their money. They receive a dollar a week, which they put 10 cents into tithe, 10 cents into long term goals and 10 cents into short term goals.
They can earn more money doing optional things (pulling weeds, etc) and I will occasionally give them money when they do something helpful without being asked (son helped father wash and clean his truck today just because, so I gave him money just because). . .
They are docked allowance if I have to ask for something to get done that they should do on their own (wipe table) or if they do something with a bad attitude. Also, we have a jar that money goes into if they are giving me an attitude, fighting, etc and that is just "go get a dime (whatever) and put it in the jar."

I have 3 kids(17, 14, 12) and so we have 3 zones/or chore lists.  Each child has a zone and we rotate zones every month.  It's too hard on me to keep track of "who's on what" if we rotate any more frequently.

 Since our son turned 15 he has been responsible for:

1. Getting up at 6am and either milking the 8 goats or feeding and
watering the goats, cows, chickens, and at one time rabbits but they are
gone now. He also collects the eggs. He and his brother alternate each day
as to who milks and who feeds and waters.

2. Washing or drying all the milking dishes, sweep the barn floor, and
wipe down barn counter.

3. Rotate milk, filter milk, clean goat rags, feed baby goats.

4. Make bed

5. Restock the toilet paper in the hall bathroom.

6. Fix breakfast every other day

7. Helps with breakfast dishes or cleaning up the kitchen after breakfast,
for example: sweeping floor, washing countertops, putting food away, load
dishwasher. We divide the kitchen up amongst 4 kids and they rotate
different chores each day

8. change diapers and help get little ones dressed. He and his sister work
on this together each morning as well as helping to potty train 1 of the
younger kids.

9. He is gone most of the day now at college so he doesn't help out as
much during the day as he did at 16. When he was 15-18 he was fixing lunch
every 4th day and helping to clean up afterwards. He also helped with
diapers throughout the day and getting younger kids down for naps.

10. He prepares dinner 1 day a week, until college he did it 2-3 times a
week.

11. He cleans up after dinner every night.

12. He milks the goats or feeds and waters animals 5 nights a week.

13. He again cleans up the barn and milking dishes after milking is done.
Also collecting eggs again and rotating milk.

14. He and his brother and sister change diapers and help all of the
younger kids get ready for bed. This includes helping one of his younger
siblings get their teeth brushed that is not old enough to do it himself.
We have 3 kids that each take a younger one in the evening to get them
ready for bed.

15. He leads family devotions 2 times a week in the morning.

16. He is responsible for filling all of our water jugs at water 'n' ice
when they empty. Usually twice a week. This chore did not begin when he
was 15 but when he was 16.5 after he got his driver license.

17. On Saturday's we all pitch in to clean the house together. He usually
cleans the bathrooms and then helps out with whatever needs to be done. He
and his brother always wash the kitchen floor to wrap up our cleaning day.

18. He folds all of his own clothes and typically helps everyone else when
he is done. He is also responsible for putting them away when he is done.

19. He runs errands for me or stops on his way home to pick something up
when I need something.

20. We have many monthly chores which rotate amongst the kids such as
scrubbing the chicken waters, scrubbing out the goat waters, cleaning the
light fixtures, etc. Everyone, no matter what their age gets at least two
of these every month.

21. He is also responsible for helping with our weekend projects.
Saturday is a work day around here and when the house is clean we head
outside. The last couple of weekends have been working on fencing all day,
before that we tore down some buildings all day, The weekend before that
we helped a friend paint their house, and the weekend before that we tore
old fencing down, before that we insulated the attic, emptied,cleaned out,
and organized the shed, digging out chicken coops etc., etc. We rarely
have a Saturday that we don't work all day. We have been doing this since
he was much younger than 16, probably started when he was about 12.

22. Our  son is also our babysitter. He watches the kids at least one evening
a week and sometimes two. He has done this since he was 14.

23. He and 3 of his siblings straighten the house before going to bed
every night, including picking up the mounds of toys that the younger ones
don't always get picked up. Sometimes this is a 5 minute job and sometimes
it takes them a good half hour.

24. He does not do this anymore as I have moved this chore on to a younger
child but when he was 14-17 he was also responsible for weed whacking all
the trim work around the yard.

25. He did not begin this until he was 17 but he is now responsible for
irrigation every other month.

I know it's not very many chores to help your case but we have 9 kids to
divide all the chores up amongst, which leaves fewer chores per kid. One
of the lucky things for kids of large families. My kids thank me for
having many kids just for this reason at times.

Even the 2 year old throws out his diapers, makes his bed, takes care of
his clothes, puts the silverware away from the dishwasher, moves the
clothes from the dryer to the basket to bring inside, and helps fold the
rags. With a little assitance from a sibling he restocks the diaper and
wipe supply as well. On Saturdays he washes the kitchen chairs with his 4
year old brother. He helps set the table for dinner and loads the
silverware into the dishwasher. He throws away the junk mail, newspapers,
etc. and helps pick up toys before lunch. He also helps with dinner if
there is something he can do such as stirring or peeling potatoes.

I can't offer a rigid set of chores or schedule, just food for thought.  We practice consensual living - an outgrowth of attachment parenting.  We do not assign chores to our almost 10 yo dd and our 7 yo, ds nor do we set aside a specific time each day to do chores.    We have only two house rules - and honestly, they are the only two you will ever need if you follow them consistently.  The two rules are as follows:   1) Do not disturb another person while they are at work or play.   2) If it is out, it must go back.   The first rule is the golden rule and the second most important commandment, a new commandment given by Christ during the Sermon on the Mount.  That commandment is "Love one another."  We rephrased that commandment in a way that our young children can understand - do not disturb...  It means:  do not annoy, bother, pester, touch, etc. another person.  Once they understand this, they begin to work their way out of their egocentric child-led view.  They become compassionate and respectful of the space(s) of others in our home, and while out in the community.  As this rule came to be a natural part of their lives, it's easy to move onto the second rule - that the house should not be "disturbed" either.   The second rule covers keeping the house, personal belongings, and self neat.  The cliche, "everything has a place, everything in it's place" was too vague.  We re-worded the phrase to: "If it is out, it must go back."   We found we had to change to the word to "must" from "need".  Must is a much stronger word and it does not leave room for negotiation.    Examples (make your reasoning "fun" too):  If _____  (toys, books, dishes, clothes, etc.) are out, they must go back.  If a bed is undone, it must be made up. If dust is on the baseboard moulding, it must be returned to the earth via the garbage dump. If the toilet gets a ring, it must be returned (resurrected) to a less hazardous (pure) state. If a child is "out" after their bedtime, they must be "put away" (this one brings giggles). For an older child, you can reinforce this through the use scriptures or values that talk of: A house of order. Preparation. Body as a temple. Standing in holy places. Resurrection - bringing things to a state of pureness and perfection. We have found that EVERY situation can fit under one of these rules - hence the need for only two house rules.  Post them for a while until they are committed to memory.  Instead of a fight, I'll hear the kids say to each other, "Number 1" or "Do number 2".  They both know what those numbers entail - and they heed the admonishment with little to no fuss.   ******************* I must add, that we do have an occasional time when we see things need a little extra attention - the kids are still learning, and it's hard to live in a constant state of perfection for everything.  For these times, we will assign a goofy job title to menial tasks that need a little extra help.  You can customize these to suit your own needs: equipment manager - sorts and neatens up bikes, balls, nets, pool toys, and other equipment business manager - sorts through office drawers AV equipment manager - sorts DVDs, CDs, and dusts off all computer/TV/DVD equipment and checks to make sure there are extra batteries for portable CD players, etc. health department inspector - cleans out and wipes out kitchen drawers and cupboards store shelf stocker - sorts linen closets, makes sure there is enough tp under each sink, arranges cleaning supplies, arranges under sink cabinets greenskeeper - miscellaneous outdoor work detective - looks for and wipes down fingerprints from walls, lightswitches, mirrors and cabinet fronts ************************* Bedrooms are personal spaces.  I do not harp too much on the rules when it comes to keeping the kids personal space neat as a pin 24/7.  The kids know that their rooms MUST be cleaned when we/they are expecting guests.  My son never lets his room get out of control - he doesn't like the end result of laboring for hours to bring up the standard.  My daughter however, prefers the pigsty effect - and ends up punishing herself bi-weekly (approx.) when she really has to have a presentable room.  They both operate under a different set of intrinsic rewards.  My son likes constants, my daughter likes a life of leisure AND the feeling that comes after accomplishing a large task.    ************************ DH hates dusting.  I detest unloading the dishwasher but love to load it up to have a clean kitchen.  So... I do all the dusting and all the filling of the dishwasher.  DH does all the unloading (each morning) and takes care of the garbage cans on garbage days. A final note.  I realize that my kids will not respond to my asking them to pitch in if those requests are random, and can happen any time.  That behavior puts anyone on edge.  To help "prepare" the kids for cleaning,  I have specific days for house duties.  As they see me first, attending to these duties, they won't offer to help, but they won't complain when I ask them to help out or do another related duty because they already see me pitching in.   M - floors and surfaces T - cars, books/study materials and library day W - clean out refrigerator, freezers and pantry Th - closets F - wash/dry/fold clothes and clean out laundry room and entry areas S (am) - floors and surfaces Almost 16 yr old son: Mows lawn, edges, trims, blows, does whatever yard work needed, takes care of pets, does dishes, folds and puts away laundry, takes out the trash, vacuums, helps pick up the house, Keeps room clean, does yard and other home fix it and home improvement projects with dad, Helps fix the cars, helps with cooking, cleaning, etc.  Also in charge of all graphic arts (making thank you cards, invitations, etc.).  Also helps with home decorating. 12 yr old son:  Mows lawn when not grass allergy season, trims, blows, does whatever yard work needed.  Takes care of pets, takes out trash, does dishes, sets table, helps with meals, and clean up.  Also folds laundry, and sometimes puts it away.  Tries to keep room clean--not always successful, takes out trash, does projects around the house with Dad, dusts, helps pick up the house, resident writer. 9 yr old son:  Thinks "work" is a four letter word, but also takes care of pets, helps with yardwork, sweeps front walk, helps with cooking, sets table, does dishes with some help, helps to fix things, picks up room when threatened, folds and puts away laundry, helps pick up house, cleans out fish filters, washes windows.    Our kids have daily chores and weekly chores. The daily chores are alternated as such: Mon-Wed---Daughter has dishes                   Son has pick up, trash and recycle Thurs-Sat---Son has dishes                     Daughter has trash/recycle/pick-up Sunday--is a day of rest for them so Dad does usually does it all.   Weekly chores were offered on an alternate schedule but the kids have chosen to not alternate and do the same chores each week.                     Daughter- cleans the hall bathroom including the bath tub and the floor, vacuums the bedrooms (we only have carpet in the bedrooms), and cleans her bedroom thoroughly. She also does her own laundry and washes her own sheets.                    Son - dusts the living room and foyer, sweeps the house and picks up doggie doo-doo. We realized the sweeping in this house takes a long time so now he usually just sweeps the living room.   The kids are now 16 and 13 but these have been their chores for several years. We eased up a little this school year because their academics have gotten more challenging and they're involved in other important things (and no, they're not playing video games instead, there's no video or computer games during the school week) so we changed it to one weekly chore on top of cleaning their bedrooms. We have always looked at each season and assessed what changes need to be made in the family trying to keep God and his kingdom first. Although we feel this is their season to be kids and should not take on all the responsibilities of adulthood, Mom should not be carrying the full load of "chores" when kids are fully capable of helping. Our kids can be asked to help fold laundry, mop, make dinner or anything else we need at any given time. They do get allowance so that they can learn to budget and tithe. Allowance has increased in value as they've gotten older and more capable of helping but I know it's not nearly as much as some kids. Sharee gets $20 every two weeks plus a cell phone and Michael gets $15/2wks. I have to say that my daughter is definitely more thorough in her work and always has been:-] She just has a tendency to see what needs to be done and do it (my way)!  My son is 11 and has daily chores, some are not daily, but are at least twice a week.  The following are chores he must do.  Oh and on Sunday's it's chores on demand, these are above and beyond normal chores.  Could be yard work, dusting, vacuuming or anything else. Regular Chores: Picking up doggie doo  4 times a week. Make bed daily Clean bedroom twice a week, includes vacuuming Empty the dishwasher daily Empty trash cans around house twice a week, Take out kitchen trash as needed Take out recycling daily and take can to street once a week Clean the main bathroom twice a week, this includes tub, toilet and floor. Give the dog his daily pill Feed the dog Water the lawn I have a 5 year old and a 3 year old.  They both do more chores than any other kids that age that I know.  My 5 y.o. is expected to make his bed, get the paper, feed and water the cat, wipe down the dining table, wipe down the floor under the table, put away all toys in the whole house, put away his own laundry, sort laundry, etc., every day.  My 3 y.o. (and a just turned 3 at that) makes her own bed, clears her spot from the table after meals, clean up toys, etc. We use Accountable Kids' peg board system to hang the chore cards on so that the kids are responsible and I don't have to nag at them.) My 12 year old son has many chores. His daily routine looks like this; MORNING: Get dressed, make bed, eat breakfast, clear dishes, take vitamins, brush teeth, feed & water animals (2 guinea pigs, hermit crab, turtle, fish, dog.), start school work. AFTERNOON: Eat lunch, clear table, practice piano, finish school work. LATE AFTERNOON: Read, pick up personal items around the house, scoop dog poop, feed animals (dog, guinea pigs, turtle, 2 Sugar gliders), take out trash and recycles (put cans out and bring in on appropriate days.) EARLY EVENING: set table, eat dinner,  help clear table, unload dishwasher & put clean dishes away. EVENING: Take a shower, brush teeth, clean up bedroom, read, go to bed. EVERY THURSDAY: Clean out guinea pig's cage and sugar glider's cage. WEEKENDS:  My husband does all our lawn work on Saturdays and our oldest son has to help.  He is now in charge of using the blower to gather all the leaves, pick up any fallen oranges and branches that get cut down. MISC.: He has chosen baseball as his hobby/extra curricula  and my husband makes him take it seriously in that he has to practice/train for it at home and not just "with the team." He does this as a teaching tool for learning good work habits not to make him the "best" player out there.  He has him do his "home training" 3 days a week, (M,W,F) where he works out on a tred mill and does some weight training.  He also has to do hitting off a "t" and has to practice pitching a 5 gal bucket of balls.  Before a game they practice catching and fielding.  My husband believes in working hard for whatever is your passion and not just relying on natural talent.  So he does this all on top of his regular daily chores/routine. He also has to take care of all of his equipment (keeping it clean and in good working order) as well as carry his own bat bag and water to games.  (This sounds pretty tough when I am writing it but really my husband is not anal or a tirant.  He was raised on a farm his whole life and learned many life lessons from hard work.) My son also has a lot of responsibilities when it comes to helping me with his little brothers.  He watches them (2 and 6) for me all the time so I can shower, rest, cook, whatever. When he does complain, I remind him, "With much responsibility comes much more privledges."  This usually is all he needs to remember why he shouldn't complain. HA My 6 year old has many chores too like make bed, helping feed guinea pigs and fish, picking up and organizing toys, clearing dishes, etc.  My 2 year old can put many toys back into their appropriate bins, put his dirty clothes into the hamper and throw away his wet diapers.   When they see brother doing stuff and they see their chore cards on the wall...they just figure it's the law. ha ha Son - age 16 (in June) Everyday Personal grooming Make bed, straighten and clean room Unload dishwasher (usually twice a day) and put away all leftovers and food preparation items for all meals (pantry and frig items) Prepare lunch for everyone Before bed pick up and put away all items personally used today.  For example personal belongings or the encyclopedia he used for school, etc. Monday Vacuum main house, hall Dust living room and the left section of the kitchen shelves (our cabinets are open so need regular dusting) Tuesday Pull all items away from back of kitchen counters and dust and wipe Clean outside of all small appliances sitting on kitchen counters Clean inside of microwave Dust middle section of the kitchen shelves Vacuum bedrooms Wednesday Dust family room Clean fronts and tops of all large kitchen appliances vacuum main house and hall Thursday Dust master bedroom Vacuum bedrooms Friday Dust Dining room Dust right section of kitchen shelves Clean under the kitchen sink vacuum main house and hall Saturday Dad jobs (as they come up) which includes landscape maintenance (mowing, etc.) Washing car(s) Bathing dogs Cleaning off patio(s), etc. I have four kids and four daily jobs which are dishes, kitchen wiper, food assistant and trash. These rotate weekly. Each person must also tidy up house and clean their room daily.  They each do a couple of hours of yard work a month.  About once a week or sometimes every other week, we all take about 4 hours on a Friday morning and clean (dust, vacuum, mop, bathrooms) the rest of the house.  I try to just ignore dust the rest of the time, so that we have a life. I am a very clean person, so this could easily rule our lives if I let it. As for your son, you can let him know that my 15 and 13 year old daughters worked on a very dirty, 5500 square foot remodel house on Saturday from 7am to 10pm.  They literally worked the entire day.  We have a family business and this house came back to us.  The work needed done and they were more than capable of contributing.  No, we did not pay them, but we did FEED them. Occasionally I pay my kids, but I sure don?t want them thinking I owe them a living.  Keeping in mind that we are in an unusual situation, we own and operate a motel in Mesa. Our 4 kids are responsible for ALL of the outside daily maintenance on the property. Typically we have it broken down as such: 1) Pool- vacuuming, skimming, backflush when neccesary, testing and maintaining the chemical balance, emptying the garbage in this area, clearing out dirty and replacing with clean towels, wiping down any tables and generally tidying it up. 2)Trash pick up- a bit more staight forward, but is responsible for covering the entire property to pick up all accumulated stuff in parking area, along walls and fences and near the buildings and walkways. 3) Parking lot- this is wher on gets to play with gas poweres help! with a blower, the driveway(being that it is old and in need of resurfacing) is down daily in sections, everything in a given area is blownto one spot and the swept up and put in dumpster. this will include rochs, tree dropping, cigarette buts and other very small stuff.4) trash cans- this child is responsible for emptying every garbage on the property evry day, I believe the are 13 outside, and 3 in the lobby/our area in back. this one aslo has the extra fun of occationally getting to wash them all out with hose and water. These lists do not include anywatering of landscaping that needs to be done ( lees so now as all plants are matured and fairly self sustaining), they also wipe down all of the outside a/c units for each room...60 in all. ALL OF THIS IS UNPAID!!!!!! They then have money earning potential with extra trimming of trees with dad, stripping rooms of all linen and garbage ahead of housekeepers on busy days, and countless other small things. They are often called upon for small maintenance issues in the rooms.....again, not paid. all said and told they have 1/2-1 hour of work per day at a minimum. And that doesn't even count their chores around the house I have great kids who know how to work well, a skill that will carry them very well into life! Oh, by the way, our girls are 14, 12, and 8 and our son is 10. Just to give you son an idea. They all rotate which chores they are doing, so they have each done then all. Our 14 yo is lookin forward to buying a pickup at 16 and starting her own pool maintenance business, and with all she's done with toilets and other plumbing is stongly considering that as a job choice from there...good money! My children are nearly all grown now. They are 20, 18, 17 and 10. My husband absolutely insisted that they have chores to help out, that we were a family and we were a team. Everyone helps out, period. Chores began in our children's lives around the age of 5. A 5 year old was expected to help with setting the table, clearing the table, emptying the smaller garbage cans throughout the house, etc. As the children got a bit older they were expected to do more. I made a chore chart listing these chores: Dusting Vacuuming Mopping Kid's Bathroom Garbages/Recyclables Dishes Feeding the pets Setting/Clearing the table Pick up living room Every day (except Sunday) the chores were listed and the names were listed. It ended up with each child doing 2-3 chores each day. I tried to stagger the names so someone wouldn't end up with the same chore two days in a row or dishes more times than someone else, etc. It wasn't perfect, but it worked. Those who still are at home are expected to help with chores. We also kept a list of "money jobs" that were additional chores we would pay them to do. These are things like cleaning out the bathroom or kitchen cupboards, wiping down baseboards or windowsills, cleaning windows & screens, lemon oiling wood furniture, etc. Those "occasional" type jobs that are nice to have done. Our homeschoolers are 4 and 5 year old young ladies. Every day they have to clean up their own dishes from the table after every meal, set the table for dinner, feed the cats, exercise the hamsters, and clean up the school area when we are finished. In addition, if they want to do anything during free play hours, they must first have cleaned their room and made their bed. They also help to put their clothes away when it is laundry time. My 10 year old son's chores are;  Take out the trash Unload the dishwasher Feed and Water the dogs Clean his room Clean up the dog mess in the backyard He also helps with other things when needed. I have 5 children ~ my oldest sons, 14 1/2 and 11 1/2, are required to help a lot.  They help with yard work: trimming, raking, mowing, picking up dog mess, etc.  They help with pool work, taking out recycling & trash, vacuuming the entire house, cleaning their own bathroom, putting their laundry away, cleaning out the garage if needed, bathing the dog, change diapers, help with preparing lunch, and babysitting the little ones (although I am now paying my oldest $2 per hour since he is so great with them and I appreciate his time with them).  All the children ( 14, 11, 7 and 5) have to make their own beds and keep their rooms clean!    My 7 year old daughter helps fold the laundry, unload the dishwasher (except for the plates that are heavy and go in the high cabinet), dust, clean the mirrors and sweep the porch.    My soon to be 5 year old son, helps match up the socks fresh from the dryer, feeds the dog, waters the flowers, and cleans the lower part of the sliding glass door :-).  He also helps put the baby's toys away.   All four of the older children help feed my baby daughter, which is actually fun for them,     My oldest pumps the gas for me when he is in the car.  My oldest boys also bring in all the groceries while my 7 year old daughter and I put them away.  My 5 year old is in charge of the grocery bags and putting the cereal away.   Each summer, the three oldest are responsible to go through their drawers and closets to see which clothes fit and which ones need to be pasted on to someone else.   We are a busy sport family and are Saturdays are booked with games.  The kids know that helping out actually makes it easier for them since they want us at the games on Saturday, not at home doing chores all day.  I always tell them that since I'm not the only one living in the house and making the mess, I won't be the only one cleaning it!!!!  One way to show your kids the benefit of "pitching in" is to only clean up your things, only wash your clothes, and only fix your meals.  They will get a "taste of their own medicine"! Daughter who is fourteen Monday - clean glass doors that open onto the patio. Clean inside and outside of microwave. Vacuum all of the upstairs (3 bedrooms and hallway) Tuesday - off...she has a class all afternoon Wednesday - Vacuum the stairs and downstairs (large living room and den) Thursday - clean her own bathroom completely Friday - dust all the blinds upstairs and downstairs. They are wood and there are 13 of them. Dust and clean her own room. Saturday - vacuum stairs and downstairs again, and there is a weekly chore she has to do such as mop the kitchen floor, help me clean the tops of the cabinets, change bed sheets She is also responsible for doing all the family's laundry as needed (although I have to keep on top of her to get that done and sometimes help her) and cleaning the stove top after dinner.   Twins are eleven, they are responsible for the dishes everyday which means emptying the dishwasher and doing the dishes after dinner. I do them during the day. Daughter  #1 does Monday - wipe molding downstairs (around doors and along base of walls) wipe stair well Tuesday - dust living room and den Wednesday - wipe down all the kitchen appliances Thursday - clean her bathroom (with her sister) Friday - sweep downstairs Saturday - vacuum and dust room and do a weekly chore such as sweep patio, wipe down light switches and doors, wash dog Sunday - take out trash (pick up is Monday) Daughter #2 does Monday - sweep downstairs Tuesday  - wipe down kitchen chairs, table and stools Wednesday  - take out trash, wipe off all kitchen counters (and clean off items on top of it - my knick knacks)Thursday - help sis clean bathroom Friday - dust living room and den Saturday - vacuum and dust room and do a weekly chore such as clean molding upstairs, clean inside refrigerator, change sheets, sweep back patio. My five year old is responsible for putting away her clothes and picking up after herself. Not sure what she will do next year, but she likes to dust! LOL! A list of chores follows but I want to share a Christian ministry resource that has blessed us tenfold that deals directly with our stewardship of chores (esp for the many young men in our house). http://www.titus2.com Managers of Their Chores and Managers of Their Home.  I had used the biblical principles in MOTH (Mgrs of Their Home) for years but it wasn't until they came out with MOTC (Mgrs of Their Chores) that I learned the importance of replacing my children's sense of entitlement (i.e. "my chores are done now so I can play" or the 'my free time is owed to me' mindset) with God's purpose for our time (and it's not just about work yipee). What I love about the MOTC resource is that it leads us to scripture about stewardship of our time and how the balance of time and service leads to His plan of ultimate joy.  It was spiritually challenging and oh so rewarding.  If you want to address the issue of family chores from a biblical mindset, MOTC is the material.  The Maxwell's mindset is also refreshing bc they teach how to train our young men to look to the future in their responsibilities now (their book, Preparing Sons to Be Providers in a double-income culture is fabulous!!!) - i.e. idleness now leads to idleness later.  It would be a great book for your husband to go over with your son so he can see what harvest he will reap down the road in how he handles his reponsibilities now.  It has helped us to teach our young men "If Dad only worked half a day like you want you to, son, then he'd only get half the pay" showing them where that leads to.  I would encourage you to first pray that your son may be open to a scripture study of God's purpose for our time and effort - are we here to serve or to have a life of ease/entertainment?  Where is the balance - it's all right there in His word! (Amen!) Second, I would invite him to obtain answers from scripture and mentorship from his Dad as well.  The following materials show applications from God's Word instead of following man's fallen example or those of the sluggards in our over-indulged culture (smile): All products by the Maxwells: http://www.titus2.com/ecommerce/products/view_main.php/1-09 MOTH http://www.titus2.com/ecommerce/products/prod_listing.php/1100 MOTC http://www.titus2.com/ecommerce/products/prod_listing.php/1150 Preparing Sons to Provide for a Single Income Family http://www.titus2.com/ecommerce/products/prod_listing.php/1130 Success or Failure: Where are You Headed? by Christopher Maxwell  (How our young men make choices (i.e. their attitude about service) will determine their future successes): http://www.titus2.com/ecommerce/products/prod_listing.php/1520 Here is another fabulous resource for your son to go over with Dad or on his own or whatever: Created for Work (which addresses the issues of chores he is dealing with) http://www.timberdoodle.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=1464 This is the first book that the above book followed which is also as fabulous in dealing with the vision of our young upcoming men: Boyhood and Beyond http://www.timberdoodle.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=906 Our eldest is soon to be 14 and is in charge of the following: all yard care (weekly), all car washing/detailing (weekly), all mopping & floors (daily), water bottles (daily), kitchen clean-up after breakfast (daily), kitchen clean-up after dinner with brother (daily), tutor a younger sibling (daily), helping hands (anything asked by mom/dad at any time), small home repair, light bulb changing duty, and his own personal laundry and room/personal care.  He can also do any of the younger siblings chores should we all need to pitch in to help an ill child with theirs, and when we all add additional help when we are extra busy he can make meals (his homemade apple pie is to die for). Before that age (not all at one time lol) he had opportunity in the following life skills: clean bathrooms, empty trash, vaccuum, dust/glass, change diapers, rotate/sort laundry, change bedding, pick up clutter when asked (daily 5 minute clean-up drill), clean ceiling fans, pool sweeper, weed puller or porch sweeper, change bedding, clean toilets, make lunches or breakfasts, trash, and helping hands (at his age/level of skill).   Son - 11 Piano practice Set table every meal Personal chores - Bible, make bed, pick up clothes, brush teeth, hair, hygiene Dishes - M-Th Make lunch - W-F Clean reading corner (all the books that get left out all day - easily 40 or so!!)   Son - 10 Piano practice Personal chores - Bible, make bed, pick up clothes, brush teeth, hair, hygiene Clear table every meal Dishes - Tu-Sa Make lunch - M-Th Clean girls' room   Son - 8 Piano practice Personal chores - Bible, make bed, pick up clothes, brush teeth, hair, hygiene Dishes - W-F Regular trash as needed (1-2x a day) Make lunch - Tu-Sa Clean closet (size of bedroom) Keep up Lego table - we have 1000's of Legos   Son - 6 Unload dishwasher anytime it's clean Personal chores - Bible story, make bed, pick up clothes, brush teeth, hair, hygiene Clean boys' room Clean toy room (about 4x8 sized area) Wipe kitchen appliances   Son - 5 Recycle trash as needed (every other day) Personal chores - Bible story, make bed, pick up clothes, brush teeth, hair, hygiene Clean closet with Kyle Clean kids' bathroom Help keep up Lego table   Daughter - 4 Personal chores - Bible story, make bed, pick up clothes, brush teeth, hair, hygiene Clean guest bathroom Clean girls' room with Michaela Pick up all kids' stuff from living room/dining room   On Saturdays, the kids do ALL the laundry - wash, dry and fold about 8-10 loads.  Typically, my husband and I start washing some of it on Friday night so they have some to start folding first thing and so we can get it finished by lunch or close.  We are on the SRP time of use plan and so we can't run the washer until after 8pm from April 1st to Oct 1st or maybe it's Nov 1st.  Our 3 oldest also have to help the younger 3 with some specific parts of their school work. Their piano and personal chore time come before breakfast, while their room chores are usually before dinner. School happens in between 9ish and 4ish with an hour or so playtime in the middle. They can do other chores that I do for 25 cents - shredding papers, filing, vacuum a room, mop a room, dust fans, clean kitchen, wash mirrors and windows.     I have twin daughters?they will be 11 years old this summer.   One week Daughter #1 does List A and Daughter #2 does List B, the following week they switch and Jessica does A, Meghan B?.this rotates each Wednesday.  List A: Wash dirty dishes and put them in dishwasher Clean both bathrooms (one each day, so both baths are cleaned every other day)?this includes cleaning the toilet, sink, counter, mopping or sweeping floor, wiping down the shower/tub, replacing towels Dust, polish each room Empty the trashes in each room into the main trash twice a week (Parent takes the main trash out to the bins) List B: Clear table after meals, stack dirty dishes on counter after scraping debris into trash; also put away leftovers and other items from dinner Remove clean dishes from dishwasher and put away in appropriate cupboards Fold/hang up clean laundry Sweep/Mop or vacuum all rooms, except baths Take the recycling out to the bin as it accumulates; take bin down to the sidewalk each Sunday evening (or Monday morning since we tend to forget Sunday evening, lol) for pickup Both are expected to keep their half of their bedroom cleaned up, including beds made; plus their playroom, each week.   In addition, they are required to help me in keeping the schoolroom picked up and organized.    They help me out with changing the beds?.we have a waterbed and they have captains beds, so none are easy to make, so we do it together.   Both also are expected to help Dad when he mows the lawn by picking up the oranges that have fallen from the tree, and being sure nothing else is in the path of the mower?.and sweeping the sidewalk of all the grass that the catcher doesn?t get.   This is not always weekly, it depends on when Dad gets around to doing the lawn!  They do other things that aren?t assigned chores, such as helping bring in and put away the groceries, helping me plan and prepare meals, making Dad?s lunch each morning, and preparing his coffee each evening (a timer coffee maker).    Sometimes the girls joke that their real name is Cinderella?.but overall they do their chores with a positive attitude?because I?ve made it clear from when they first started helping put laundry away at age 4 or 5, that keeping the house is everyone?s job, even Daddy does his share when he comes home from working all day.  I have daughters.  Here's their list. Daily: 12 year old - make bed, scoop up dog poop, feed & water 2 mini horses, take out trash & recycles 14 year old - make bed, scoop up horse poop, feed & water dogs, empty dishwasher Weekly:  12 year old - clean her bedroom, dust & vacuum living room, family room, & her bedroom, 14 year old - clean her bedroom, sweep all uncarpeted floors, dust and vacuum her bedroom, clean the 2nd bathroom, Also: Both girls also have to help out with extras as needed, such as folding towels, yardwork (no mowing yet), cleaning the game room, and occasionally washing dishes 17-male DAILY   kitchen counters picked up, mop the floors (It's a huge heavy job), pick up family room once a day, twice weekly garbage, during the summer will usually mow one yard, once a week, some days dishes, does own laundry once a week. 16-female Daily  pick up kids bathroom, feed and water the cats, help with younger sisters, help with cooking, dishes once a week, in charge of putting food away, own laundry 15-male  Daily sweep floor, pick up dog poop, take out trash, clean out van, help with lawn mowing and sweeping outside, own laundry 14-male  Daily  feed and water dogs, dishes once a week, lawn mowing a yard, own laundry, helping with younger siblings Chores are part of our school each day, and most of them change each day.  I put on their assignment cards the chores for the day in the morning after I assess what needs done the most.  Here are examples of chores they do. Each child does 4 chores each day.  Usually 1 outside chore and 3 inside chores.  I gear them as appropriate for age.  I put examples of what type of chores each child might do.   Daughter 11 - feeds horses, fills water trough each morning.  She also may vacuum, dust, pick up certain rooms, sweep, mop kitchen floor, wash sliding glass doors or windows, dog pooper scooper, vacuum out car, clean bathroom, put away laundry, load dish washer, etc.   Daughter 8 - feeds chickens each morning & collects eggs.  She also may vacuum, dust, pick up certain rooms so they can be vacuumed, sort laundry, put away laundry, put away dishes, clean out car, sweep, etc.   Daughter 5 - keeps dog water dish full, picks up rooms, cleans base boards, uses a dry or wet swiffer mop to do floors, clean up toys out in yard, etc.   Hope this helps. They can usually finish them up fairly quickly if they get motivated.  1/2 hour sometimes.  They don't complain nearly as much since I made it part of school.  They get a card each morning with school on the front and chores on the back.  They are free to go back and forth.  Everything has to be done on the card for their "day" to be done.  So if they had a particularly intensive math assignment, for example, they can take a break and do a quick chore.  It's been working so far!   I also gear the chore sometimes to whomever made the mess.  If 1 child has a lot of their stuff in a room, they get that room to pick up.  We don't tie allowance into chores because we feel it's just part of life.  We give allowance for them to learn how to save/spend money wisely.  We do, however, have extra things that are above and beyond that they can do to earn extra money.  These are chores that wouldn't be normal things.  Usually a bit more intensive, like clean out the barn, feed troughs, hen house, stalls, weeds, etc.  My 8 yo daughter folds her clothes and puts them away, cleans all the toilets and washes them down,  vacuums the furniture, sweeps front and back porches, does all trash duties, windexes all the appliances in the kitchen, makes her bed and unloads the dishwasher. My 11 yo son folds his clothes and sometimes puts them away, helps clean the bathrooms, sweeps the pool 3x's per week and checks the filters daily, mows the lawn, makes bed, unloads dishwasher, vacuums the whole downstairs, takes care of the recycle bucket and anything else that might need done.   My son without job:  mow the lawn 1x/week except winter clean a bathroom 1x/week                              tidy room every day                                 clean/dust/vacuum room 1x/week                                 responsible for own laundry washing/drying/putting away                                 help dad with misc. chores on Saturday                                 take out garbage as needed                                 take garbage cans to curb                                 irrigate lawn My son with job:        same chores as above, minus bathroom and Saturday help, but showed a bit                          more grace on timing.  Didn't have to irrigate in middle of the night.   My daughter without job:    sweep/mop house 1x/week                                         cook 1 dinner/week                                          tidy room every day                                        clean/dust/vacuum room 1x/week                                        responsible for own laundry washing/drying/putting away                                        help mom with misc. chores on Saturday                                         dust living room 1x/week                                         check pool chemicals weekly and add as necessary My daughter with job:        same chores, minus the pool and Saturday help, more grace   They also had to care for any animals they had at the time.    As the kids got older, worked more and became more involved in church activities, chores lessened and the smaller children (or I  :) picked them up.  At 18, full time at cgcc, working 16hrs/week and volunteering at church my daughter sweeps/mops once every two weeks, cleans her bathroom 1x/week and tends her own room and laundry.  She also pays most of her own expenses (1/2 of camps, all auto insurance, all gas, all meals out except those with the family and extra cell phone goodies).  We have two children, ages 5 and 7.  We have taught them to obey 1)right away, 2)all the way, 3)with a happy heart (good attitude), like Abraham did.  They know that if one of those elements is missing (even though the other two may be present, that still reveals disobedience and a heart that dishonors parents and God.  We have also studied what the Bible says about being a sluggard.  The chores they do regularly that I can think of include: * (as needed) folding laundry and putting away linens and their own clothing *(weekly) wiping kitchen cabinets, washer, pantry, doors, and doorways with rags/soapy water (these are all white and show dirt and smudges easily) *(weekly) wiping the kitchen table and chairs with rags/soapy water (to keep white chairs and table free of smudges and stuck-on food) *(daily) pick up dog poop as a team and put in a can (no bickering allowed - teamwork required) *(weekly) clean mirrors and patio door with glass cleaner *(take turns daily) help parents do dishes and load dishwasher *(as needed) help parents with yard work (such as raking, putting clippings into trash bag) *(weekly) cleaning the dogs' water bowl with soap and scrubber to keep from getting moldy *(twice daily) feeding the dogs *(weekly) sweeping sand from patio back into sandbox area *(weekly) sweeping floor and front porch *(as needed) helping parents to carry out the trash (they can't do it on their own yet - alley trash containers are too big) *(weekly) taking toys off their shelves and wiping dust from the shelves with rags & soapy water *our son has cleaned the toilet with Comet and a scrub sponge at times (wearing rubber gloves, of course, as I don't think the stick thing works very well)  He actually told me he wanted to do it! *helping to get dinner on the table by setting it, tearing lettuce, whatever is needed.  A wise mom in our church said she taught her kids at a young age to ask "How can I help, Mom?" *cleaning up after themselves before beginning a new endeavor. *the kids have helped to mop before (we have wood laminate and tile), but my husband still prefers me to do it so that it gets done more accurately.  I do have them "skate" around the floor with dishtowels under their feet to dry what I have mopped.  They think this is fun. We do pay a weekly salary for some of these chores.  The kids have giving banks where they tithe, save, and spend.  We have recently started offering "bonus" pay if the kids do certain things without being asked, just as an employer might give bonuses to employees who go the extra mile.  We have a paper on the fridge where we mark certain letters for certain actions that they have done on their own.  This has given them incentive to be more proactive. My eight year old home schooled son has chores...that are required...ie...he doesn't get paid for....which include...unloading the dishwasher....vacuuming the whole house...cleaning his bathroom...cleaning his room and setting the dinner table....and assisting his 2 year old sister in picking up the front room......assist in washing....folding and putting away his laundry He gets paid for extra chores....ie cleaning up the back porch and pool area....washing house windows.....cleaning the garage out. My dtr who will be two on April 20th...has to assist in loading silverware...and setting napkins on dinner table...and helping to clean off the supper dishes....within reason for a two year old!  She also has to pick up the front room...and assist in putting her own laundry away! We have three daughters still living at home (12, 15, & 17).  Within the last year and a half we moved from a very small home in MN to a much larger home here, in AZ.  With the move came a family discussion that in order to keep the home looking nice and presentable (they LOVED the spacious rooms, etc.) we, the entire family, were going to have to commit to keeping it that way.  Since they were very young, I would tell them that it is much, much easier for everyone to clean their own individual messes than to have one person clean after an entire family.  (In MN we also had our oldest son still living with us -- he's 21 now). So, we're on a rotation schedule.  The main jobs are:  (1) Kitchen; (2) their bathroom (house bathroom) & house trash/recyclables; & (3) Floors -- that includes vacuuming and washing.  Kitchen, of course, is the most extensive since it is daily and includes loading and running the dishwasher at night, emptying it first thing in the morning (so they need to guage their time in the morning to be able to do that and not be late to school), wiping the counters and table, wiping the front of the appliances, making sure the microwaves are clean inside, and changing out the wash cloth and dish towel when needed.  Oh, and putting away the dinner leftovers nightly.   Their bathroom must be cleaned over the weekend (they choose which day) and includes, cleaning the tub and shower surround; cleaning the toilet, sink, counter, and mirror; Making sure the toilet paper is stocked and washing the rugs and household towels.  (Washing towels also means folding and putting them away.)  Since bathroom was only once a week, we decided to throw in trash and recyclabes also.  So, trash goes out daily, recyclables as needed.  The big cans are taken to the street on their given days and brought back.   Floors is really the least amount of work.  We do have a long haired dog so vacuuming once a week is essential.  They must complete the floors during one of the weekend days.   In this way, the jobs aren't overwhelming and they get a taste of what's involved with running a household.  Our youngest has been the only one to complain or be lazy when doing a job she doesn't like.  She's also been the only one who has then been assigned ALL the jobs for a week.  This has only happened a couple of times and she's quickly begun to understand that if you do the job you're assigned well, without grumbling, then that's all you'll have but if you think one job is too difficult, then we'll just give them all to you.  (Funny, she has a much better attitude about the rotation!)   All this is in addition to them each doing their own laundry.  Our 15 yr old began doing her own laundry when she was 7 (she's very organized and fussy about things and felt she wanted to be responsible for her own laundry).  Our 17 yr old didn't begin until she was almost 11 because she's a bit more spacy and unfocused.  We had to write the instructions for using the machines and put the instructions in plastic sleeves and attach to the wall by the machines for her but she did like being able to do her own laundry.  Our 12 yr old has been doing her own laundry since she was about 8, I think.  It's SO much nicer that they understand that life isn't just handed to them and that life and "being a grown-up" is not "easy" and that there are always obligations and pressures.   The older girls also go out with their dad grocery shopping and EVERYONE is expected to unload the car when people have come back from shopping.  They automatically come out and offer to unload the car and they are wonderful to put things away.  Being a part of a family means being active and contributing.  I must tell you, they constantly get compliments from others when they attend a function or go to someone's home because they are often the only ones to help clean up without being asked.  They'll jump to assist with holding doors, carrying items, cleaning up after an event, and generally offering any assistance.  I feel best knowing that they are going to go out in the world be helpful and an asset, not a liability. 13 year old boy: Cleans kitchen- this includes washing all dishes, putting away all food products, wiping down counters and appliances, sweeping and swiffering the floors as needed. This is to take place after EVERY meal. Additionally, he has to do much of the heavy lifting in the house (he's 5'10" and 160+lbs...big kid!) and because I am a full time midwifery student, he has to watch his 5 year old and 3 year old brothers one day a week in addition to completing his schoolwork. Also, he is in Civil Air Patrol which requires that he be able to pass PT, so he has to run a mile several days a week. I would list keeping his room clean, but he is a neatnik and his room is reliably the cleanest in the house at all times. 10 year old girl: Keep the floor in living room, family room, and hallways picked up. Same floors to be vacuumed once per day. Clean bathroom including wiping down sink, counters, tub, toilet, remove any accumulated laundry, sweep and swiffer as needed. Fold any and all laundry that is done. Take out the trash and see to it that the outside can is to the street the night before trash pick up days, which is twice a week. Keep her own room neat-ish. Also, because of my student status, she must come to work with me one day per week to help watch her 3 month old little brother while I see clients. She must also get up in the night with me anytime one of my clients goes into labor to watch her little brother while I monitor the labor and birth. I step out to feed him as appropriate, but otherwise, she must supervise him. On those days, she is to accomplish schoolwork during his nap times. 5 year old boy: Must clean his bedroom which he shares with two brothers, including making beds, picking up toys, and removing any dirty laundry. Dust all wooden furniture. Help his older brother in the kitchen by unloading the dishwasher of all things that belong in the lower shelves/drawers. 3 year old boy: Help with whatever parents or older siblings ask. (pick up things from floor, put away some laundry) Feed pets. My 5 year old collects the trash thoughout the house and takes it out, she takes out the recycling, sets the table for dinner, helps rinse dishes after I wash, hangs up her own fresh laundry, sorts her laundry, cleans her room weekly, dusts the living room, and helps weed the garden. When I was 16, I had a part time job, and I did my own laundry, did the dishes every day, took out the trash, vacuumed and dusted the house, mopped the kitchen floor, cooked dinner twice a week for the family (when my mom worked late), and cleaned the bathroom. Even with the homework associated with public school, there was plenty of time in the day.  Our girls, ages 13 and 15, aren?t always overjoyed about chores, but they do have a good understanding that chores are part of life and they are expected to do them cheerfully.   Here is what the girls are required to do on a daily basis: - Clean the cat box (one does morning and one does evening) and sweep the laundry room floor - Feed the cats and give them fresh water - Laundry - wash, dry, fold, put away - Dishes - Clean their bedrooms - Help with meal preparation and clean-up Weekly/Periodic chores: - Collect trash - Vacuum (including stairs and couches) - Sweet all tiled areas - Wipe down bathrooms - Help clean out the fridge before grocery shopping - Dust We have also trained our girls that when I return from the grocery store or doing any shopping they are to come out and help bring groceries or purchases into the house.  I usually call when I'm on my way home to let them know I'm on the way.  I don't even have to ask for their help anymore.  They throw their shoes on and come out to help as soon as they hear the car in the garage.   They also unload the groceries onto the counter and help me put them away.  I usually stay in the kitchen and start putting groceries away while they are bringing them in from the car and then they help me finish putting away what's left. Whenever there is a special cleaning project they are usually required to help with that as well.  Things like cleaning out a closet, cleaning the garage, cleaning the car, etc.   It is just part of life.  My husband pleasantly announces, "please get your shoes on and meet me outside, we're going to clean the van."   Having a bad attitude is not an option.  That doesn't mean that they are always thrilled about the project , but they do come and help willingly.    If there is any moodiness or bad attitude privileges are lost, but we don't really deal with that anymore.    When one of the girls neglects her cat chores, she gets to do both morning and evening cat box cleaning for an entire month.  That punishment is effective and rarely needs to be used.  The most important thing to my husband and I is the heart attitude of our children.  It is important that they keep their rooms clean, of course, but the more important issue is that they are caring for the things they have and being good stewards.  We talk to them about stewardship a lot.  It's important to me that they obey, but I want them to do so promptly and cheerfully with a good attitude.  I want their heart not just their hands.  We talk about heart attitudes a lot too.  We work hard not to allow laziness, bitterness, sullenness, etc. to take root in their hearts and their habits.   When we see a negative character trait rising up, we assign them opportunities to overcome that character trait (i.e. laziness is met with extra opportunities to work hard, less time for relaxing, work must be done before play, etc.)   Our children do not expect rewards for their labor and we do not bribe them to work ("If you help me with this, I'll give you that.").  However, we do like to bless them by taking them for ice cream or Starbuck's or even sometimes giving them extra cash when they've helped with an extra project.  I love to reward them as long as they don't expect it - or demand it - or think they've earned it for helping around the house.  We do give them a monthly allowance but we do not pay for chores. 12 year old daughter Kitchen: (DAILY) Trash (recycle and regular) Set the table and clear the table for dinner Put food away in the fridge Clear dishes and scrape them   Breakfast/lunch: when I am behind she makes soup, cereal, sandwiches, oatmeal, toaster waffles for both her and Analisse   pets: feed and water cats   Laundry:    (WEEKLY) fold all the clothes for everyone put all FOLDED the clothes in proper baskets     each person has their own basket take the baskets to each person's room fold the towel and kitchen towels and put them up hang up, fold, and put away all her own laundry   Room:    (WEEKLY) we have a house cleaner so she has to: pick up all laundry, separate them per color, and put them     with the weekly laundry to be washed. pick up her floor of all things so the house keeper can vacume make up her bed put up all trinkets on her counters so they can be dusted   grocery day: (depends upon when I run out) put up all dry goods help put up all refrigerated items   Car: must clean out the car once a week since all the stuff in it is hers anyway   Shopping: If she wants to go around the store without me, she has to take her younger sister.     My 13yo son is responsible for the following tasks, in addition to any we ask him to perform "on the spot" (such as helping with landscaping)... Wash towels, underwear, rags once a week Wash rugs as needed Clean bathrooms thoroughly (showers, toilets, sinks, mirrors) once a week Spot clean bathrooms twice a week, as well as when visitors are expected Take out garbage once a day, as well as when needed Rinse dishes after each meal and load/unload dishwasher as needed Collect mail from mailbox each day Spot clean carpets as needed (usually he spends a few minutes each day to keep this well managed) Sweep the pool once a week (we have an in-floor cleaning system so once a week is usually enough, but most pools require it more often) Rake the front lawn once a week Make breakfast and/or lunch as needed (but usually a couple times each week) Help make dinner once a week My 11yo son is similarly responsible for the following tasks... Dust one room of the house each day (such that the house is completely dusted each week) Vacuum the living room and family room and hallway each day Vacuum the remaining rooms once a week Edge one room of the house (on a rotating basis) with the vacuum attachment once a week Clean one room's windows and mirrors (except bathrooms) each day (such that the house's windows and mirrors are cleaned each week) Help make dinner once a week Clear dinner dishes Skim the pool as needed (again we have a great cleaning system so the need is minimal, especially since our neighbor cut down his Jacaranda!) Sweep the sidewalk and driveway once a week Sweep the back patio as needed My 9yo son is responsible for the following, but also helps out "on the spot"... Fold the items that his 13yo brother washes Sweep and spot the kitchen and entry areas daily Sweep and spot the kitchen nook (where we eat) after each meal Sweep and mop all tiled areas once a week Wipe down doorknobs and light switches daily Wipe down baseboards in one room of the house (same room being edged by his 11yo brother) once a week Help make lunch each day Help make dinner once a week Set the dinner table Weed as needed in both front and backyards (usually while his brothers are skimming and sweeping the pool) Wipe down the back patio tables as needed Of course each of the boys have the normal daily activities of making their bed and keeping their rooms clean. In addition, they help their father wash and vacuum the vehicles as they are able.   Although the boys are free from most chores on the Sabbath, they serve at church. My oldest son works in the 4s/5s room as a teacher's assistant, where he sets up the room, sets out and prepares the snacks, manages the kids on the playground, helps focus the kids during lesson time, and assists with their crafts. All three boys also work alongside their father cleaning and closing down the church after service (for the nominal pay of $1 per hour). In this capacity, they empty all garbage cans, put in new liners, and carry out the garbage bags to the dumpster. They sweep and vacuum 12-15 rooms, in addition to the stairs, two lobbies and two hallways. Sometimes, they need to clean windows and set up chairs. Basically, they clean up anything that looks out of place, like Bibles or papers left around or trash on the playground. They accomplish this while my husband is putting away tables, checking the bathrooms and kitchens, and locking doors, along with anything else that has come up requiring his attention.  Of course, by the time the boys have reached age 16 they will possibly be responsible for more things, but definitely different things so that each has experience with each area. Their workload will also depend on the outside activities in which they are involved, especially on employment or apprenticeship. I have two girls, ages 8 and 10.  Together they do the following: Morning Routines make their bed, wash up, hair, quick-clean bathroom (see list below), dress, pick up room, do a load of laundry if needed (they do all their own laundry), feed/brush dogs, breakfast, clean the kitchen (see list below), personal bible study, clean the back yard (dog poop)  Day Routines Both girls have a list of things to study that day, they move through them independently.  I butt-out, but am always around for questions and help.  They get about 2/3 done, break for lunch, and then finish after lunch.  Then they practice (violin & viola) independently, then together, and again - I'm around for help if they need it, or if I hear they need it.  Evening Routines Set the table while and assist in making dinner.  They do as much of the cooking as they are capable of doing.  After dinner they walk through the house and put away whatever may have strayed out through out the day, then shower and off to bed. During the day, as needed, they dust, vacuum, wipe chair rails or baseboards, sweep, clean their bathroom (serious clean - not the 'quick clean'), take out the garbage (empty all the waste baskets into the kitchen garbage, take that out, and replace the bag), sweep the patios, etc. My older daughter is from my first marriage - so when she goes to visit her dad, (every other Thursday-Sunday) the 8 year old does the entirety of morning, day and evening routines. I have a chart on the wall with 9 daily chores.  Each of my 3 kids has to do (dishes, all trash out, etc.) Plus they are all responsible for a clean room (not perfect, but clean) Plus they must take showers every day, every other day if there's a major schedule upset. Every day one of them must sort, wash, dry, fold and put away his or her laundry.  They all have a specific day that's theirs, if it's towels that day, we all help, if it's sheets/pillowcases, they are responsible for their own.   Detention here is hand-scrubbing a kitchen or bathroom tile floor.  (only had to use that once with my oldest and the other 2 caught on quick).   My kids are 13, 11 and 8. My girls are 8 & 10 Daily they are responsible for each cleaning a cat box 2x a day, each checking on their rabbits and partridges, feeding them, cleaning their water, cleaning their pen (it is 7ft x12 ft and needs new hay frequently, not to mention how messy the rabbits are) They feed the cats and fill their water 2x a day.  The do the dishes at least once a day (we don't have a dishwasher and their are 5 in the house) The 8 yr old takes out the compost daily (her least favorite job) and has to empty all the trash cans in the house (mom likes lots of little trash cans everywhere) The 10 yr old also does laundry daily. (sort, wash, dry, put away) The 8 yr old vacuums.  The 10 yr old cooks dinner frequently (although she does not consider that a chore) They wash the car about once a week.  (usually because they want to) There are several other things they do as needed such as scrubbing the floor, gardening, projects, but they don't consider them chores (at least not always).   We used to have a lot more complaints about chores, but I stopped paying any allowance and explained that part of being a family is sharing the load.  They are part of the family, with all of the rights and responsibilities.  There are times that I relieve them from a chore because they have done more than their share in something else, but as a rule the things mentioned above are their jobs. There have been times that my eldest says its not fair, she does more than me of something, etc.  I go over her list, go over my list with her, and let her see which jobs I do she wants to do instead.  She usually goes back to her list without further discussion.   I know my girls are younger, so they don't do as much as older kids, but they are learning.  Most of their chores have to be done before 9 am so we can start school work.  We also live an hour from town and have to go in 3x a week for my mother's physical therapy, so it throws a wrench in the day.  My 15 year old son is responsible for all of the outdoor yard work at our home: mowing, pullling weeds, edging, blowing and cleans the pool as well. Inside the house, he cleans a bathroom completely twice a week, every morning makes his bed and picks up his bedroom. He is responsible to make lunch every day for the 6 of us at home. The days that we aren't cleaning the bathrooms, (so three days of the week) we clean a section of the house so that by the end of the week the whole house has been cleaned. The four kids and I work together to accomplish this, spending from 20 to 40 minutes each of those three days. The type of work he does here involves dusting, vacuuming, picking up, wiping windowsills and baseboards, cleaning ceiling fans, you get the picture. Zone 1/Kitchen - While on this zone they have basically have to keep up w/general kitchen cleaning.  This includes loading/unloading the dishwasher, keeping/cleaning the table & counters cleared & clean, taking out the trash, clearing the table (everyone clears their own dishes, but this person clears the bowls, margarine, condiments, etc.). In addition, they need to keep the floor swept and on Friday's need to mop & soft scrub the sink. During the week, they also have to wash the items that are too large for the dishwasher.  They hate to be on kitchen, because the work is so constant.  Not hard, just always there. Zone 2/Vacuuming, dusting - This person needs to vacuum all common areas (living, dining, hallway) every Mon/Wed/Fri.  In addition on Friday's they need to dust those same areas  and vacuum the stairway. This is considered the "easy zone"   Zone 3/Family room - Sweep the family room every Mon/Wed/Fri and mop it on Friday's in addition to dusting the family room. This person is also responsible for picking up dog poop (3 dogs!) in the backyard at least once per week.    In addition, every Mon/Wed/Fri everyone is responsible for getting their laundry sorted into baskets in the living room, making their beds, emptying both their bedroom & bathroom trashes and cleaning their bathroom mirrors & counters.  My daughter has 2 cats and she does their litter boxes on Mon/Wed/Fri as does my son who has a rabbit. On Friday's they do a more thorough cleaning on the bathroom.  If needed, they vacuum their rooms on Friday's as well.   I don't know if that sounds like a lot to you or not, but we've been blessed with a large house (4000 sq ft. / 4bathrooms) so the area's are significant.  My kids are 10 and 8. For a weekly allowance they have pick up dog doo, take out trash, recycling, and fold and put away all their laundry, pick up room and play areas, and anything else we ask.  As they get older more will be added such as dishes, vacuuming and bathrooms.

My 8 yo daughter folds her clothes and puts them away, cleans all the toilets and washes them down, vacuums the furniture, sweeps front and back porches, does all trash duties, windexes all the appliances in the kitchen, makes her bed and unloads the dishwasher. My 11 yo son folds his clothes and sometimes puts them away, helps clean the bathrooms, sweeps the pool 3x's per week and checks the filters daily, mows the lawn, makes bed, unloads dishwasher, vacuums the whole downstairs, takes care of the recycle bucket and anything else that might need done.

"Above all we need, particularly as children, the reassuring presence of a visible community, an intimate group that enfolds us with understanding and love, and that becomes an object of our spontaneous loyalty, as a criterion and point of reference for the rest of the human race."   Lewis Mumford